Let's Talk Tug-of-War

Inner Voice (full of excitement):  Hey! Don’t forget we need to make that call to that guy about that one thing. Today is the day! Let’s make it happen! We’re gonna be great! 

Avoidance Voice (no excitement):  Hmm… Great? Not so sure about that one. I think that call can wait until tomorrow. 

Inner Voice (full of hope):   But that’s what you said yesterday. In fact, that’s what you have said every day this week. Why keep putting it off? I bet they’re just waiting to hear from us so we can WOW ‘em!

Avoidance Voice (no hope):  WOW ‘em? C’mon now. I don’t know about WOW’ing anybody. We’ll do it tomorrow. 

Inner Voice (full of confidence):  But why? We have 10 minutes right now. I’m sure it won’t take longer than that. We know how to make a FABULOUS impression in NO TIME flat! 

Avoidance Voice (no confidence):  Fabulous impression? No time flat? Not sure what made you think that? Besides, there’s that one other thing I need to do first…before calling. And I think this is the time of day where that guy is busy. And dinner. You know it’s almost time to start making dinner. 

Inner Voice (full of vim & vigor):   Uuummm… I MADE you do that other thing last week. And this is the time of day the guy said to call. And no need to make dinner…there are enough leftovers for days because you went into a cooking frenzy yesterday…instead of calling the guy. Now, no more excuses! Let’s go shine! 

Avoidance Voice (no vim, no vigor):  Shine? What the heck are you talking about? I mean… Well… (head hanging)

Inner Voice (full of positivity):  Here’s the number. Go ahead and start dialing. We’ve got this! We can do anything! 

Avoidance Voice (no positivity):  Anything? We can’t do anything. There’s LOTS we can’t do. But… OK. Fine. I’ll do it. But I need to charge my phone first…


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Haven’t we all had those moments where we (unconsciously) step outside of ourselves, becoming the silent observer to an internal conversation about our need to move forward…or not. We watch what is the equivalent of a mental and emotional tug-of-war, fueled by a debilitating drive to avoid all things that may lead to uncomfortable feelings (ie. disappointment, frustration, fear, sadness, etc). 

In this space, we often lose sight of one very important fact… Life is not meant to be lived with internal barriers reminding us of the old mistakes that leave us questioning our greatness. Purpose cannot thrive in that space. 

Life is meant to be lived authentically, driven by divinely appointed passion. A passion that is unique to you and your precious journey through this life. 


Are You Ready to Stop Playing Avoidance Tug-of-War? 


It’s Time to Call a Spade a Spade — Here’s thing, we all expect others to be honest with us about what they think, feel, want, etc, but how often are we that kind of honest with ourselves? We can spend a lot of time pretending everything is “A-OK!” when it really is not. When we are honest with ourselves about where we are on the inside, we are better able to address the avoidance from a place that creates sustainable growth. 


Chances Are… — When we are operating with even and ounce of avoidance, taking chances is a scary prospect. I mean, who wants to risk having to deal with failure, disappointment or sadness? I know I don’t. The problem is, if we don’t take chances, we miss opportunities to learn and grow. And that means we are blocking the path to our greater purpose. Chances are, if we step out of faith, trusting Divine guidance, even IF we fall, we will always be able to get back up again. 


Who’s Sittin’ at Your Table? — If you had a dinner party today, who, from your circle of friends, would you invite? And why? When you think of your relationships with those people, are they the folks who will help you stay distracted from moving closer to your vision or the folks who will remind you that you will never be able to have a Great Life and Avoidance on the same plate? Choose your guests wisely. 


Help is On the Way… IF You Ask — Sometimes we need support to help us tackle that beast of avoidance. When we have the right people at our table, it’s so much easier. And sometimes one of the people at our table needs to be our Life Coach. No. Asking is NOT always easy, but it IS always necessary. Whether it is your closest friend-circle or your Life Coach (who can feel like a friend), help is on the way…IF you ask.