It's All Perfect
“It’s all perfect.”
She would say that to me again and again. As I cried. As I asked “What about ___?” As I wished for a different reality.
My response? Typically a pair of rolled eyes, confused by the notion that THIS is what perfection looked like.
More often than not I was overwhelmed by a myriad of well-hidden, not-so-good feelings. The hiding had become draining, causing deeper feelings of overwhelm. THIS could not be what “perfect” felt like.
I sat in her office, sharing the inner workings of my heart. I sat before her, emotionally bare, some part of me wanting to believe her words, the greater part of me held onto a steady state of resistance.
She knew it. She felt it. And amidst my resistance, she remained consistent…
“Sherry, it’s all perfect. Exactly as it is supposed to be in this moment.”
Interestingly enough, as time went on, I rolled my eyes less and believed more.
What does this, “It’s all perfect” thing really mean?
Most of my life I chased "perfection" as though I were a starving tiger and "perfection" was my next meal. There were many times where I caught my prey but found myself too tired from all the effort to enjoy the fruit of my labor. And then there were the times my prey eluded me altogether, leaving me feeling weak and disappointed.
What I slowly learned, as I chose to roll my eyes less and trust more, was the importance of honoring the perfection of the journey.
The “perfection” I chased was based on a perceived idea that everything is supposed to happen a particular way...at a particular time...on a particular day. I had learned that in order for something to be “perfect” it had to feel good, bring endless happiness and essentially make all my dreams come true. Life could not possibly be perfect if my dreams were not coming true.
The choice to accept that "It's all perfect" meant allowing myself to experience all parts of life, even those that created not-so-good feelings, so I could appreciate, more fully, the journey to dreams come true.
No. Getting there was not easy. Like everything, it’s a journey. There are moments in time when I fall on my face (sometimes literally), overcome by the reality before me, trying to understand the perfection in grief, disappointment, sadness. After I have allowed myself to have that moment, to feel all its parts, I push myself remember the blessings found every experience, the lessons that help me be, live and do my best. The lessons that create true perfection along the journey.
Ready to try opening your heart to the possibility that "It's all perfect"? Try these things...
Start each morning with thoughts about what you are grateful for. Take it a step further and write them down. Instead of just writing or thinking about them quickly, allow yourself to FEEL the joy connected to each item/experience you identify feeling grateful for.
Take a couple of minutes to look at yourself in the mirror and say, "It is all perfect. I am perfect. This day is perfect." Try repeating this affirmation to yourself, or something similar, a few times each day for two weeks. Notice how you feel. Does this shift your energy/mood?
In every difficult situation there is a lesson to be gained, an opportunity for growth. Take time to look for the growth opportunity in the situation that lends to not-so-good feelings. Consider all the ways that situation has made you a better person overall?
Ask for help. Again, I realize this is not an easy concept to take on. If you want guidance around this topic, click on the Let's Connect button to set up your complimentary consultation.